Rita Moreno is a self-described “gregarious” person,
but she recently found herself suffering from loneliness.
In an interview with PEOPLE, the actress and singer, who turns 92 on Dec. 11,
recalls feeling “so sad” after she recently moved from her house in California’s Berkeley Hills
area to a new condominium that she loves.
“It was affecting my appetite,” says Moreno, whose husband of 45 years, Leonard Gordon, passed away in 2010 at age 90.
“My daughter [jewelry designer Fernanda Luisa Gordon] noticed and she said, ‘What’s wrong?’ I said I didn’t know. I didn’t know what was wrong,” continues the West Side Story icon. “I really didn’t understand what was happening.”
“I remember thinking, ‘I can’t go on like this.’ I’m in the most beautiful apartment in the world as far as I’m concerned, and this is happening. Why is this happening?” she says.
“I took all my experience in therapy, psychotherapy, and just kind of punched it together and said, ‘What’s wrong? Something’s wrong, and it has to do with you since you moved,’ ” says Moreno, who stars in the new Netflix movie Family Switch.
Rita Moreno and daughter Fernanda Luisa Gordon. Chris Pizzello-Pool/Getty
It dawned on Moreno that although she has a loving network of friends and family — including her daughter and two grandsons — they’re not all near by. “So when we make plans to see each other, we have to make plans, they can’t just kind of drop by,” she explains. “I was really lonely.”
“It’s the most fascinating thing to learn about yourself,” adds Moreno, who also realized she didn’t know how to make friends.
“I’ve never had to seek people’s company,” she explains. “You know why? Because people have always come to me.”
“One day I thought, ‘This is ridiculous. I have to meet some people,’ ” says Moreno. “That particular day when I made that decision, I went to the supermarket to do some shopping, and I ran into a lady who I kept running into, who’s lovely.”
“She had this big smile on her face, and she recognized me, obviously, and we started to talk. I said to her, ‘Would you like to have lunch with me?’ ” continues Moreno, who said she didn’t even know the woman’s name at the time.
JAMIE MCCARTHY/GETTY
“She said, ‘Lunch with you? Really?’ I said, ‘Yeah.’ She said, ‘Yeah.’ We went and had lunch,” according to Moreno. “She sat down and she said, ‘Do you always pick people up like this in the market?’ ”
“I told her the truth. I said, ‘No, but you always have struck me as such a lovely person. Since I’m new here and I don’t know anybody, I thought I’d take a dip.’ ”
Since then, the two have become pals. “She’s lovely,” says Moreno.
That woman is one of several folks Moreno has befriended. “I also met people from the apartment, the building, who are marvelous,” she says. “I’m so lucky.”
Rita Moreno on March 13, 2022.
Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty
Earlier this year, U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy declared loneliness to be an epidemic.
“Social connection is a fundamental human need, as essential to survival as food, water and shelter,” Murthy wrote in an 81-page advisory report released in May. “Throughout history, our ability to rely on one another has been crucial to survival. Now, even in modern times, we human beings are biologically wired for social connection. Our brains have adapted to expect proximity to others.”
“Loneliness is far more than just a bad feeling,” he explained. “It harms both individual and societal health. It is associated with a greater risk of cardiovascular disease, dementia, stroke, depression, anxiety and premature death.”
Last month, the World Health Organization also declared loneliness a “pressing health threat.”